Anyone here like Homestuck? Gec (yes, our Gec) actually composed some of the music for it, which is pretty neat. I've personally thought about worming my way into the Homestuck crew myself someday (the normal way - waiting for them to ask for fanart contributions).
I must add, if there are any surprise Homestuck fans who check the forum and were not aware of my absolute obsessed liveblogging and speculation about it on the Discord server - This is a postcanon-positive space. I think that Roxy's relationship with gender on both timelines is wholesome, the conflict between Dirk and Calliope is really clever, Yiffany is a great and narratively relevant character, and Jane's corruption into a fascist on the Candy timeline is honestly the best written villain arc that I have ever seen in my life.
I've actually been thinking on and off for quite some time now about the possibility of a Homestuck / Sagan 4 crossover. And I thought of it before I found out about the inexplicable Sagan 4-esque collaborative spec evo arc in Homestuck Squared.
I suppose for someone unfamiliar with Homestuck's lore, a Sagan 4 / Homestuck crossover sounds completely absurd. Even for someone familiar with Homestuck's lore it doesn't seem plausible without Naucean interference. The Nauceans would not like it if the Game was played on their little terraforming project, and if they saw a Frog Temple, they would no doubt try to destroy it.
But Skaia "knows" and "sees" and can choose destinations for the meteors that ensure its own existence. Suppose the meteor bearing the Frog Temple landed somewhere difficult to see from space, such as in the middle of Jujubee Ocean. Landing in Otter Vents would mean an underwater volcano would fill the role of the Forge, which I don't think has ever happened in Homestuck's extended multiverse before, but it probably isn't impossible. Unfortunately, this also limits what species can play the Game to those who are able to explore the deep ocean before their extinction, unless the part of the ocean floor where it landed happens to ever end up close to or above the surface. But that probably won't be a problem, as for a species to play the Game they need to have computers, and by that point they probably already have some ability to explore parts of the ocean and could find the Frog Temple by chance.
Of course, with those last few details and with how playing the Game almost guarantees that there will be a mass extinction event far worse than any Sagan 4 is likely to ever have, a crossover would have to be an entirely alternate universe scenario. But it might be fun to examine how it would go, and what each of the sapients might look like in dream and god tier pajamas.
I suppose for someone unfamiliar with Homestuck's lore, a Sagan 4 / Homestuck crossover sounds completely absurd. Even for someone familiar with Homestuck's lore it doesn't seem plausible without Naucean interference. The Nauceans would not like it if the Game was played on their little terraforming project, and if they saw a Frog Temple, they would no doubt try to destroy it.
But Skaia "knows" and "sees" and can choose destinations for the meteors that ensure its own existence. Suppose the meteor bearing the Frog Temple landed somewhere difficult to see from space, such as in the middle of Jujubee Ocean. Landing in Otter Vents would mean an underwater volcano would fill the role of the Forge, which I don't think has ever happened in Homestuck's extended multiverse before, but it probably isn't impossible. Unfortunately, this also limits what species can play the Game to those who are able to explore the deep ocean before their extinction, unless the part of the ocean floor where it landed happens to ever end up close to or above the surface. But that probably won't be a problem, as for a species to play the Game they need to have computers, and by that point they probably already have some ability to explore parts of the ocean and could find the Frog Temple by chance.
Of course, with those last few details and with how playing the Game almost guarantees that there will be a mass extinction event far worse than any Sagan 4 is likely to ever have, a crossover would have to be an entirely alternate universe scenario. But it might be fun to examine how it would go, and what each of the sapients might look like in dream and god tier pajamas.
I drew a sagon as the Witch of Mind. The torch design is made up but meant to look kinda Mindy, perhaps vaguely hypnosis-themed. The Witch of Mind is one who Manipulates Mind for herself, after all, which could mean using mind control.
Sagon would be right at home in Homestuck on account of not having any arms. Imagine the beginning of some kinda crazy crossover story called BURROWMIRED where the "retrieve arms from chest" gag gets turned on its head.
EDIT: Oh wow. The Homestuck fandom had a very positive reaction to this.
Sagon would be right at home in Homestuck on account of not having any arms. Imagine the beginning of some kinda crazy crossover story called BURROWMIRED where the "retrieve arms from chest" gag gets turned on its head.
EDIT: Oh wow. The Homestuck fandom had a very positive reaction to this.
I find that I enjoy imagining fictional characters interacting with Sagan 4. So I'm gonna do that with some Homestuck characters.
In the pre-scratch universe, Sagan 4 ended in April 2009 on the same day Homestuck began because most or all of Sagan 4's members died in the reckoning. It's fun to imagine a potential sburb session played by active members of the time, but that's for a different post. Instead we're focusing on how Sagan 4 differs because of some Homestuck characters interacting with it.
John Egbert has zero interest in Sagan 4 and never considers joining, if he knew about it at all.
Rose Lalonde, at age 11, tried to join at its peak in 2007 by making some absolutely wretched species of ukfauna. She misinterpreted ukfauna anatomy very badly and it was rejected.
Around the same time, Jade Harley also tried to join, unaware that Rose had tried. Jade had more success and made a good number of nodents and shrews throughout 2007, 2008, and early 2009. You know she would.
Dave Strider didn't join Sagan 4, but he knew of it, because his Bro signed up and made several species, including the ugliest sauceback to ever exist. Bro was later banned for toxic behavior, a few weeks before the events of Homestuck.
Rose's Mom probably knew of the project, but didn't contribute.
That's about it.
--
In the post-scratch universe, things get more interesting. In this universe, which is closer-aligned with our own, Homestuck begins in 2011, so a lot of major events in Sagan 4 history have already happened.
Jane Crocker is actually a big fan of Sagan 4, but she'd never contribute, she could never do that. Having an interest in frightening fauna, she is fascinated by the species produced in the alienification phase and saddened by the post-snowball resurgence of Earth clones. In other words, it's a good thing she didn't join because she would almost certainly alienify everything to the point of no longer being recognizable or functional. She likes saucebacks, though.
Jake English probably wouldn't have too much of an interest in Sagan 4, at least at first.
Roxy Lalonde would know of it, for certain, but I'll get to that in a little bit.
Then there's Dirk Strider.
Dirk would know of Sagan 4, and of everything that happens after 2011. He has read every single entry that exists or will ever exist on Alpha, Beta, and Gamma. He has made numerous fan species based on all three timelines. Since Sagan 4's flooding event was happening in 2011, either Dirk or Roxy has on at least one occasion tried to use it to explain to Jane what Betty Crocker did to the Earth, with no success.
Wait...what the heck is Sagan 4 Gamma?
Though the post-scratch universe aligns more with ours, things do eventually diverge. In this universe, Homestuck is real instead of a work of fiction. In late 2021, the adult post-scratch version of Rose Lalonde joins Sagan 4 (both Alpha and Beta) under a pseudonym and joins me and Colddigger as a third Monarch of The Cursed, contributing greatly to deep sea ecosystems with each new organism weirder than the last. She became a beloved member, and some years down the line as Sagan 4 had to face the unprecedented threat of its members being killed in the hilarocaust, she vanished. As I was still alive, I tracked her down and learned her real name and that she had been killed after trying to make a stand against Betty Crocker. It was not long after this that Miraheze and Jcink went down for good, rendering Sagan 4 Alpha and Beta inaccessible, though fortunately not without backup.
We few surviving Sagan 4 members banded together to make a Sagan 4 Gamma that was not just a collaborative spec project, but an act of rebellion in Rose's honor. After getting our hands on something like ecto-alchemy equipment stolen from Crockercorp, we were also able to make our submissions real; this included Alpha and Beta species that we still had the data for, as well. Physical manifestations of our artwork helped us defend ourselves against Imperial Drones and whatever else Betty Crocker sent our way as we all gathered at a base of operations atop a mountain unaffected by the water apocalypse--and all surviving Sagan 4 members got to meet in real life, albeit out of necessity for survival. Sagan 4 Gamma rapidly also became a safe haven for people all over the world seeking protection from Betty Crocker's tyranny. It thrived like no version of Sagan 4 ever had before, as it became a sort of symbolic thing for everyone who entered our protection to make a species and there were quite a few creative minds who had survived the genocide and apocalypse thus far.
Sagan 4 Gamma became one of the longest holdouts of humanity free from Betty Crocker's rule, lasting over 150 years after the rest of civilization has fallen. But we, or rather our descendants, couldn't really do much meaningful against her, so she didn't really care after a while and just left us alone. Sagan 4 Gamma became the largest and longest-running spec evo project of all time. But our time was not to last forever. Without a common enemy, our descendants started fighting amongst themselves, and eventually the ecto-alchemy equipment and other stuff they had depended on for food is destroyed. Mass starvation leaves behind a survivor population too small to keep up, and eventually the last members of Sagan 4 Gamma, like the rest of humanity, have died.
A few centuries later, Dirk Strider discovers the project and the backups of Alpha and Beta and decides to start Sagan 4 Delta. It's a seed world with all the best and most iconic species from all 3 timelines.
Of course Roxy is a member. She knows all about Gamma because it was made in her Ancestor's honor, and the idea of contributing and even making descendants of Rose's species?
Jake joins and tries to make the aliens from avatar. Of course he does.
Callie probably contributes some wonderful artwork. I could see her brother Caliborn trying as well. Dirk has no standards so he just approves Caliborn's scribbles, including a diorama where he seems to be attempting to depict a crestgill from Beta in a sexy pose.
Then there's Jane. From her perspective, it's still 2011. She thinks Dirk just made up the limbo, Sagan 4 Beta, the Mason revival, the retcon event, Sagan 4 Gamma, famous author Rose Lalonde of all people being a member, and...really, tamjacks becoming tool users, saucebacks evolving into birds, and those primitive cloney nodents coming back from the dead? There's no way those would ever be approved! But she contributes to Sagan 4 Delta anyway. She turns some saucebacks into Beasts from Problem Sleuth.
--
Eventually, the new universe is created and there's Earth C. Both sets of human kids live as Gods on the same planet now. Rose finds out about post-scratch Sagan 4 and about Sagan 4 Delta and is immediately interested. Jade is sad that nothing like her pre-scratch contributions existed after the scratch but also wants to resubmit some of them, now remade and improved, to Delta. Jane wants to make stuff for Delta for the nostalgia, as does Roxy. Dirk is no longer interested in running Delta, but Callie is. Thus the project kicks up again under Callie's management, and before long Alpha, Beta, and Gamma are brought back too, though they mostly get contributed to by mortals while Delta remains the thing of the Gods.
And now the surviving trolls know about it too. All of them make at least one species and Kanaya becomes the project's dedicated "plant guy". Terezi also contributes regularly, making some pretty neat and colorful cursoriopedes, so when she left Earth C and re-entered canon to look for Vriska, it was the loss of a great member.
Over the next 7 years, each Creator contributed to Delta at least once, even those who hadn't had any interest in Sagan 4 in the past like John and Dave. They sometimes contributed to the restarted other 3 timelines as well. Gcatavrosprite manages to make a fairybull out of a pinyuk and it's actually really clever how he does it.
Sagan 4 Alpha reaches the end of its habitable period by the time of the Meat/Candy split, leaving it complete, while Beta, Gamma, and Delta are still ongoing.
This post is getting too long I'll brainstorm what the meat/candy split does another time
In the pre-scratch universe, Sagan 4 ended in April 2009 on the same day Homestuck began because most or all of Sagan 4's members died in the reckoning. It's fun to imagine a potential sburb session played by active members of the time, but that's for a different post. Instead we're focusing on how Sagan 4 differs because of some Homestuck characters interacting with it.
John Egbert has zero interest in Sagan 4 and never considers joining, if he knew about it at all.
Rose Lalonde, at age 11, tried to join at its peak in 2007 by making some absolutely wretched species of ukfauna. She misinterpreted ukfauna anatomy very badly and it was rejected.
Around the same time, Jade Harley also tried to join, unaware that Rose had tried. Jade had more success and made a good number of nodents and shrews throughout 2007, 2008, and early 2009. You know she would.
Dave Strider didn't join Sagan 4, but he knew of it, because his Bro signed up and made several species, including the ugliest sauceback to ever exist. Bro was later banned for toxic behavior, a few weeks before the events of Homestuck.
Rose's Mom probably knew of the project, but didn't contribute.
That's about it.
--
In the post-scratch universe, things get more interesting. In this universe, which is closer-aligned with our own, Homestuck begins in 2011, so a lot of major events in Sagan 4 history have already happened.
Jane Crocker is actually a big fan of Sagan 4, but she'd never contribute, she could never do that. Having an interest in frightening fauna, she is fascinated by the species produced in the alienification phase and saddened by the post-snowball resurgence of Earth clones. In other words, it's a good thing she didn't join because she would almost certainly alienify everything to the point of no longer being recognizable or functional. She likes saucebacks, though.
Jake English probably wouldn't have too much of an interest in Sagan 4, at least at first.
Roxy Lalonde would know of it, for certain, but I'll get to that in a little bit.
Then there's Dirk Strider.
Dirk would know of Sagan 4, and of everything that happens after 2011. He has read every single entry that exists or will ever exist on Alpha, Beta, and Gamma. He has made numerous fan species based on all three timelines. Since Sagan 4's flooding event was happening in 2011, either Dirk or Roxy has on at least one occasion tried to use it to explain to Jane what Betty Crocker did to the Earth, with no success.
Wait...what the heck is Sagan 4 Gamma?
Though the post-scratch universe aligns more with ours, things do eventually diverge. In this universe, Homestuck is real instead of a work of fiction. In late 2021, the adult post-scratch version of Rose Lalonde joins Sagan 4 (both Alpha and Beta) under a pseudonym and joins me and Colddigger as a third Monarch of The Cursed, contributing greatly to deep sea ecosystems with each new organism weirder than the last. She became a beloved member, and some years down the line as Sagan 4 had to face the unprecedented threat of its members being killed in the hilarocaust, she vanished. As I was still alive, I tracked her down and learned her real name and that she had been killed after trying to make a stand against Betty Crocker. It was not long after this that Miraheze and Jcink went down for good, rendering Sagan 4 Alpha and Beta inaccessible, though fortunately not without backup.
We few surviving Sagan 4 members banded together to make a Sagan 4 Gamma that was not just a collaborative spec project, but an act of rebellion in Rose's honor. After getting our hands on something like ecto-alchemy equipment stolen from Crockercorp, we were also able to make our submissions real; this included Alpha and Beta species that we still had the data for, as well. Physical manifestations of our artwork helped us defend ourselves against Imperial Drones and whatever else Betty Crocker sent our way as we all gathered at a base of operations atop a mountain unaffected by the water apocalypse--and all surviving Sagan 4 members got to meet in real life, albeit out of necessity for survival. Sagan 4 Gamma rapidly also became a safe haven for people all over the world seeking protection from Betty Crocker's tyranny. It thrived like no version of Sagan 4 ever had before, as it became a sort of symbolic thing for everyone who entered our protection to make a species and there were quite a few creative minds who had survived the genocide and apocalypse thus far.
Sagan 4 Gamma became one of the longest holdouts of humanity free from Betty Crocker's rule, lasting over 150 years after the rest of civilization has fallen. But we, or rather our descendants, couldn't really do much meaningful against her, so she didn't really care after a while and just left us alone. Sagan 4 Gamma became the largest and longest-running spec evo project of all time. But our time was not to last forever. Without a common enemy, our descendants started fighting amongst themselves, and eventually the ecto-alchemy equipment and other stuff they had depended on for food is destroyed. Mass starvation leaves behind a survivor population too small to keep up, and eventually the last members of Sagan 4 Gamma, like the rest of humanity, have died.
A few centuries later, Dirk Strider discovers the project and the backups of Alpha and Beta and decides to start Sagan 4 Delta. It's a seed world with all the best and most iconic species from all 3 timelines.
Of course Roxy is a member. She knows all about Gamma because it was made in her Ancestor's honor, and the idea of contributing and even making descendants of Rose's species?
Jake joins and tries to make the aliens from avatar. Of course he does.
Callie probably contributes some wonderful artwork. I could see her brother Caliborn trying as well. Dirk has no standards so he just approves Caliborn's scribbles, including a diorama where he seems to be attempting to depict a crestgill from Beta in a sexy pose.
Then there's Jane. From her perspective, it's still 2011. She thinks Dirk just made up the limbo, Sagan 4 Beta, the Mason revival, the retcon event, Sagan 4 Gamma, famous author Rose Lalonde of all people being a member, and...really, tamjacks becoming tool users, saucebacks evolving into birds, and those primitive cloney nodents coming back from the dead? There's no way those would ever be approved! But she contributes to Sagan 4 Delta anyway. She turns some saucebacks into Beasts from Problem Sleuth.
--
Eventually, the new universe is created and there's Earth C. Both sets of human kids live as Gods on the same planet now. Rose finds out about post-scratch Sagan 4 and about Sagan 4 Delta and is immediately interested. Jade is sad that nothing like her pre-scratch contributions existed after the scratch but also wants to resubmit some of them, now remade and improved, to Delta. Jane wants to make stuff for Delta for the nostalgia, as does Roxy. Dirk is no longer interested in running Delta, but Callie is. Thus the project kicks up again under Callie's management, and before long Alpha, Beta, and Gamma are brought back too, though they mostly get contributed to by mortals while Delta remains the thing of the Gods.
And now the surviving trolls know about it too. All of them make at least one species and Kanaya becomes the project's dedicated "plant guy". Terezi also contributes regularly, making some pretty neat and colorful cursoriopedes, so when she left Earth C and re-entered canon to look for Vriska, it was the loss of a great member.
Over the next 7 years, each Creator contributed to Delta at least once, even those who hadn't had any interest in Sagan 4 in the past like John and Dave. They sometimes contributed to the restarted other 3 timelines as well. Gcatavrosprite manages to make a fairybull out of a pinyuk and it's actually really clever how he does it.
Sagan 4 Alpha reaches the end of its habitable period by the time of the Meat/Candy split, leaving it complete, while Beta, Gamma, and Delta are still ongoing.
This post is getting too long I'll brainstorm what the meat/candy split does another time
I would love to see someone who knows nothing about Homestuck try to determine what Homestuck is about based only on the above post
...oh. So that's how Betty Crocker factors into it.
This is like a very long, semi-cohrerent dream based on vague recollections of Sagan 4 combined with Homestuck characters, pop-cultural figures, and subject to huge time skips and multiple timelines.
I suppose this only reinforces how difficult it is to explain Homestuck. Last time I stopped reading Homestuck, it had only one major character, and it was a few pages after the marble bust next to a door in the first chapter/section.
This is like a very long, semi-cohrerent dream based on vague recollections of Sagan 4 combined with Homestuck characters, pop-cultural figures, and subject to huge time skips and multiple timelines.
I suppose this only reinforces how difficult it is to explain Homestuck. Last time I stopped reading Homestuck, it had only one major character, and it was a few pages after the marble bust next to a door in the first chapter/section.
I've read Homestuck all the way through 3 times and am on fourth read-through, this one dedicated to the study of Dave Strider
Years have passed since the new universe was created. The Homestuck Epilogues are about to begin, and with them come the Sagan 4 Epilogues.
--
John eats a big plate full of raw meat like some kind of carnivore and runs off to fix Homestuck's plot holes, thus establishing the Meat timeline.
Dirk Strider, perhaps tired of just making derivative works for Sagan 4 Delta, distracts everyone by helping Jane Crocker run for president. The chaos that followed drove Callie insane, causing Sagan 4 (all three current timelines, as Callie maintains them all) to go through a dead month--its longest hiatus since the Gods took it over. Dirk proceeded to kidnap Rose and manipulatively snatch the newly-returned Terezi, and they run away into outer space to start a new collaborative spec project called Deltritus that will be so much better and more plot important than Sagan 4. Dirk proceeds to make Sagan 4 ripoff species anyway.
By the way, that is actually what happened in the story.
With nearly everyone either dead, part of Dirk's new collaborative spec project, or trying to stop Dirk's new collaborative spec project, nearly all the Creators are gone from Earth C and, by process of elimination, Jake English takes over Sagan 4. This goes about as well as you would expect, but we are very fortunate Jane Crocker was too busy being president because she would have been first choice between the two and you know what she would have done.
--
John thinks a big pile of candy is an acceptable lunch and runs off to create a plot hole in Homestuck, thus establishing the Candy timeline.
Sagan 4 Beta, Gamma, and Delta run mostly uninterrupted on this timeline. Mostly. The sudden death of Dirk Strider, who created Sagan 4 Delta and was the main reason Sagan 4 even survived into the new universe, is a pretty big deal, and all timelines are swamped with memorial submissions. This causes an extensive backlog of unreviewed species, many of them very low quality and clearly religious in nature. Callie is overwhelmed and it ultimately results in a complete restructuring of Sagan 4's rules and submission system to account for sudden flooding.
Many of the Creators have less time to focus on Sagan 4 as they start having families with kids to raise. For the first time in years, Sagan 4 Delta has more mortals contributing to it regularly than Gods. But the memorial submission incident is not the last utterly insane thing Sagan 4 will ever face on the Candy timeline.
Also, Jane Crocker eventually returns to Sagan 4 despite being busy with...all her Candy timeline stuff. Callie's efforts to stay politically neutral and keep Sagan 4 politically neutral can't do much against Jane trying to legally micromanage the project after being offended that some mortal troll made an extremely ugly buck-toothed arthrothere that she thought was supposed to look like her. She attempts to limit how many submissions from trolls are allowed, but Callie doesn't let that fly.
Somewhere along the way, Sollux Captor, who fell from the sky at some point, submits a species to Beta out of nowhere. Nobody knows how he drew it while blind, not even me. It's a highly derived spardi that looks like a bee, but red and blue.
Gamzee Makara, the plot hole who established the timeline, also tries to make a species. It's bad. Callie approves it anyway because Gamzee is a sort of father figure to her.
A little over four years after the Candy timeline split off, the ghost rain begins. Millions of ghosts of the same 23 trolls from numerous timelines, all falling from the sky. Among other things, about 700 different ghosts of Nepeta Leijon independently discover Sagan 4 and try to submit virtually identical species to Gamma, all of them apex predators for the same biome at that. This is obviously a problem and it clogs the flood control system in an unprecedented manner.
This is resolved with the creation of a new rule: all ghosts of the same person must share and coordinate submissions so that they don't do...that. Also, Equius ghosts are rapidly auto-banned from contributing after several nsfw musclebeast-inspired things get submitted.
Sagan 4 enters a weird era for a while, obviously.
Years pass. Sagan 4 Gamma, having been far ahead of the rest due to its head start compared to the other timelines, reaches the end of its habitable period, being marked complete and leaving only Beta and Delta. Despite Callie's ongoing efforts, more and more politically charged submissions slip through the cracks, and as she's being poisoned by associating with Jane, right-leaning political submissions are more likely to make it in.
In time, the children of the Gods are old enough to contribute to Sagan 4.
Among them, of course Harry Anderson Egbert is the first to join, making several species for Beta and Delta. Also, he writes and directs a Sagan 4 musical for theater class, because of course he would. It's the most beautiful thing to ever exist and the costumes are top notch.
Yiffany Longstocking also learns of the project and contributes under a pseudonym. She mainly contributes to Delta. Her contributions, though amateur, show promise, and perhaps someday she could become the next monarch of the cursed.
Tavros Crocker joins Beta as a one-hit wonder. Just a single submission. It's some cell distantly descended from the goliathpseudopodia line.
Vrissy Maryam Lalonde isn't supposed to contribute to Sagan 4 because her moms saw the political drift and stopped contributing themselves. However, Vrissy contributes anyway, making a few species here and there for both Beta and Delta that are like little rebellions against the Crockerian influence.
Eventually, the race war begins, and Callie cuts ties with Jane and tries to set Sagan 4 back on a politically neutral path with Roxy's assistance. The sudden deaths of Gamzee Makara and Dave Strider independently cause memorial submission floods, but they are kept under control.
And that catches us up pretty close to the latest upd8 of Homestuck Squared. Who knows how future events will affect Sagan 4 on the Candy timeline?
--
John eats a big plate full of raw meat like some kind of carnivore and runs off to fix Homestuck's plot holes, thus establishing the Meat timeline.
Dirk Strider, perhaps tired of just making derivative works for Sagan 4 Delta, distracts everyone by helping Jane Crocker run for president. The chaos that followed drove Callie insane, causing Sagan 4 (all three current timelines, as Callie maintains them all) to go through a dead month--its longest hiatus since the Gods took it over. Dirk proceeded to kidnap Rose and manipulatively snatch the newly-returned Terezi, and they run away into outer space to start a new collaborative spec project called Deltritus that will be so much better and more plot important than Sagan 4. Dirk proceeds to make Sagan 4 ripoff species anyway.
By the way, that is actually what happened in the story.
With nearly everyone either dead, part of Dirk's new collaborative spec project, or trying to stop Dirk's new collaborative spec project, nearly all the Creators are gone from Earth C and, by process of elimination, Jake English takes over Sagan 4. This goes about as well as you would expect, but we are very fortunate Jane Crocker was too busy being president because she would have been first choice between the two and you know what she would have done.
--
John thinks a big pile of candy is an acceptable lunch and runs off to create a plot hole in Homestuck, thus establishing the Candy timeline.
Sagan 4 Beta, Gamma, and Delta run mostly uninterrupted on this timeline. Mostly. The sudden death of Dirk Strider, who created Sagan 4 Delta and was the main reason Sagan 4 even survived into the new universe, is a pretty big deal, and all timelines are swamped with memorial submissions. This causes an extensive backlog of unreviewed species, many of them very low quality and clearly religious in nature. Callie is overwhelmed and it ultimately results in a complete restructuring of Sagan 4's rules and submission system to account for sudden flooding.
Many of the Creators have less time to focus on Sagan 4 as they start having families with kids to raise. For the first time in years, Sagan 4 Delta has more mortals contributing to it regularly than Gods. But the memorial submission incident is not the last utterly insane thing Sagan 4 will ever face on the Candy timeline.
Also, Jane Crocker eventually returns to Sagan 4 despite being busy with...all her Candy timeline stuff. Callie's efforts to stay politically neutral and keep Sagan 4 politically neutral can't do much against Jane trying to legally micromanage the project after being offended that some mortal troll made an extremely ugly buck-toothed arthrothere that she thought was supposed to look like her. She attempts to limit how many submissions from trolls are allowed, but Callie doesn't let that fly.
Somewhere along the way, Sollux Captor, who fell from the sky at some point, submits a species to Beta out of nowhere. Nobody knows how he drew it while blind, not even me. It's a highly derived spardi that looks like a bee, but red and blue.
Gamzee Makara, the plot hole who established the timeline, also tries to make a species. It's bad. Callie approves it anyway because Gamzee is a sort of father figure to her.
A little over four years after the Candy timeline split off, the ghost rain begins. Millions of ghosts of the same 23 trolls from numerous timelines, all falling from the sky. Among other things, about 700 different ghosts of Nepeta Leijon independently discover Sagan 4 and try to submit virtually identical species to Gamma, all of them apex predators for the same biome at that. This is obviously a problem and it clogs the flood control system in an unprecedented manner.
This is resolved with the creation of a new rule: all ghosts of the same person must share and coordinate submissions so that they don't do...that. Also, Equius ghosts are rapidly auto-banned from contributing after several nsfw musclebeast-inspired things get submitted.
Sagan 4 enters a weird era for a while, obviously.
Years pass. Sagan 4 Gamma, having been far ahead of the rest due to its head start compared to the other timelines, reaches the end of its habitable period, being marked complete and leaving only Beta and Delta. Despite Callie's ongoing efforts, more and more politically charged submissions slip through the cracks, and as she's being poisoned by associating with Jane, right-leaning political submissions are more likely to make it in.
In time, the children of the Gods are old enough to contribute to Sagan 4.
Among them, of course Harry Anderson Egbert is the first to join, making several species for Beta and Delta. Also, he writes and directs a Sagan 4 musical for theater class, because of course he would. It's the most beautiful thing to ever exist and the costumes are top notch.
Yiffany Longstocking also learns of the project and contributes under a pseudonym. She mainly contributes to Delta. Her contributions, though amateur, show promise, and perhaps someday she could become the next monarch of the cursed.
Tavros Crocker joins Beta as a one-hit wonder. Just a single submission. It's some cell distantly descended from the goliathpseudopodia line.
Vrissy Maryam Lalonde isn't supposed to contribute to Sagan 4 because her moms saw the political drift and stopped contributing themselves. However, Vrissy contributes anyway, making a few species here and there for both Beta and Delta that are like little rebellions against the Crockerian influence.
Eventually, the race war begins, and Callie cuts ties with Jane and tries to set Sagan 4 back on a politically neutral path with Roxy's assistance. The sudden deaths of Gamzee Makara and Dave Strider independently cause memorial submission floods, but they are kept under control.
And that catches us up pretty close to the latest upd8 of Homestuck Squared. Who knows how future events will affect Sagan 4 on the Candy timeline?
imagine trying to figure out what Homestuck 2 is about based only on the above
(Note: I drew everything here.)
Now for something a little crazy: the tale of Troll Sagan 4, which is much longer and complicated and will need to be split into parts. See, there's troll versions of an unexpected number of things. There's a troll Will Smith, literally just named Troll Will Smith. There's a troll Adam Sandler, literally named Troll Adam Sandler. There's a troll John Cusack, literally named Troll John Cusack. There's a troll Betty Crocker, literally named Her Imperi--
Wait.
Okay, pushing Crockerian nonsense aside, for some reason there is also a Troll Sagan 4. Founded by 5 friends, two indigobloods (Hydrom Ancerx and Yoktou Cythil), a rustblood (Huggak Krukka), a goldblood (who went only by the screen name The Eggbeast), and a limeblood (Krakow Samuel), they just wanted to have some fun evolving creatures. And what a weird world they created, where plants are green instead of purple (apart from those beautiful amethyst-looking crystal plants, also coming in yellow, deep blue, and white), and where basically everything else is exactly the same as our Sagan 4 Alpha for the first 8 Wipes [Weeks] or so apart from color differences. Well, there were other differences, but I'll get to them later. But everything changed in Wipe 9.
In Wipe 9, Generation 57, The Eggbeast submitted the troll version of the feathered sauceback, here known as the feathered saucebeast.
In Generation 59, one hit wonder RomanticFurScience submitted the bloodbonding saucebeast.
The initial version of this submission was worse, being in all caps, filled with emoticons, and significantly more puns, and she had to be reminded of the strict policy against distracting typing quirks in species descriptions. Further, she had initially mistaken the saucebeast nostrils for eyes and had to come up with an explanation as to how it can have a hemospectrum without being able to see. It was approved, but in frustration with the effort to type normally, RomanticFurScience never submitted another species.
This had significant repercussions in the following few Wipes. also not bothering with gen numbers after this point because it's too much work shh
"Oil glands, a great way to keep eggs moist, have begun to develop on the fivetail saucebeast, allowing it to incubate its eggs more effectively. It has gained extra tails, in reality duplicant stumps like in the original stumpbeast, which help it to spread itself out over a clutch of eggs."
"The galloping saucebeast replaced its ancestor. The fivetail saucebeast has grown from a small creature with many tails to a creature capable of sprinting on six legs. ... Another large change is that the egg-moistening glands on the saucebeast's belly have begun to produce a "milk" like substance, though it's still too primitive to be very useful so it still feeds its grubs solid food."
"The grubsaucebeast has also developed better parental care and it has evolved an actual milk line that has teats, mammary glands, and other tissues."
And from there, as the Wipes pass in-game and the perigees pass in real life...
(Troll Cheatsy made centaur clones)
(Troll Somarinoa fixed the jaws...and evidently also turned filtersquids into horrorterrors)
(...Uh-oh.)
Of course, those are not the only kinds of saucebeast around still...
Including non-hexapod hemospectral saucebeasts that DIDN'T turn their jaws into horns...
and more basal saucebeasts that drink plent blood...
...but a familiar drama is on the horizon.
Stay tuned for part 2 where the Homestuck connection in this alternate Sagan 4 becomes more obvious and irreversible because I don't want to write the WHOLE THING tonight
Now for something a little crazy: the tale of Troll Sagan 4, which is much longer and complicated and will need to be split into parts. See, there's troll versions of an unexpected number of things. There's a troll Will Smith, literally just named Troll Will Smith. There's a troll Adam Sandler, literally named Troll Adam Sandler. There's a troll John Cusack, literally named Troll John Cusack. There's a troll Betty Crocker, literally named Her Imperi--
Wait.
Okay, pushing Crockerian nonsense aside, for some reason there is also a Troll Sagan 4. Founded by 5 friends, two indigobloods (Hydrom Ancerx and Yoktou Cythil), a rustblood (Huggak Krukka), a goldblood (who went only by the screen name The Eggbeast), and a limeblood (Krakow Samuel), they just wanted to have some fun evolving creatures. And what a weird world they created, where plants are green instead of purple (apart from those beautiful amethyst-looking crystal plants, also coming in yellow, deep blue, and white), and where basically everything else is exactly the same as our Sagan 4 Alpha for the first 8 Wipes [Weeks] or so apart from color differences. Well, there were other differences, but I'll get to them later. But everything changed in Wipe 9.
In Wipe 9, Generation 57, The Eggbeast submitted the troll version of the feathered sauceback, here known as the feathered saucebeast.
In Generation 59, one hit wonder RomanticFurScience submitted the bloodbonding saucebeast.
| QUOTE |
 Bloodbonding Saucebeast (Plumatherium quadrantus) Creator: RomanticFurScience Ancestor: Feathered Saucebeast Habitat: Wright Dimwoods, Ittizz-Eggbeast Desert, Hydrom-Nuke Dimplains, Eggbeast-Hydrom Darkplains Size: 110 cm tall Diet: Carnivore (anything in the 0.5 - 4 m long range) Reproduction: Sexual, Eggs, Two Genders The bloodbonding saucebeast replaced its ancestor the feathered saucebeast. It has evolved a hemospectrum and quadrants fur even stronger social bonds. It can't s33 that it has a hemospectrum though but it can smell it. Its packs can be very large now with the alpha females usually being fuchsiablood all the way down to the rustblood omega. This k33ps the packs in order fur greater unison so they can hunt larger prey! The four quadrants also k33p the bloodbonding saucebeast packs from falling apart from conflickt by giving efurry pack member romantic bonds with many packmates of diffurent ranks! Efurry rank on the hemospectrum inside a pack is interlinked with the others by these quadrants, so that the highbloods will always have reason to care fur the lowbloods and so the lowbloods will not be left out by their rank. Some younger packs don't have efurry blood color, being formed starting with disfursal midbloods which form quadrant relationships with disfursal saucebeasts lower and higher on the hemospectrum. The bloodbonding saucebeast is grey because silfury feathers reflect harsh sunlight if it is caught out in the open at dawn, while still k33ping it nice and hidden in the dark of night (=^ω^=) |
The initial version of this submission was worse, being in all caps, filled with emoticons, and significantly more puns, and she had to be reminded of the strict policy against distracting typing quirks in species descriptions. Further, she had initially mistaken the saucebeast nostrils for eyes and had to come up with an explanation as to how it can have a hemospectrum without being able to see. It was approved, but in frustration with the effort to type normally, RomanticFurScience never submitted another species.
This had significant repercussions in the following few Wipes. also not bothering with gen numbers after this point because it's too much work shh
"Oil glands, a great way to keep eggs moist, have begun to develop on the fivetail saucebeast, allowing it to incubate its eggs more effectively. It has gained extra tails, in reality duplicant stumps like in the original stumpbeast, which help it to spread itself out over a clutch of eggs."
"The galloping saucebeast replaced its ancestor. The fivetail saucebeast has grown from a small creature with many tails to a creature capable of sprinting on six legs. ... Another large change is that the egg-moistening glands on the saucebeast's belly have begun to produce a "milk" like substance, though it's still too primitive to be very useful so it still feeds its grubs solid food."
"The grubsaucebeast has also developed better parental care and it has evolved an actual milk line that has teats, mammary glands, and other tissues."
And from there, as the Wipes pass in-game and the perigees pass in real life...
(Troll Cheatsy made centaur clones)
(Troll Somarinoa fixed the jaws...and evidently also turned filtersquids into horrorterrors)
(...Uh-oh.)
Of course, those are not the only kinds of saucebeast around still...
Including non-hexapod hemospectral saucebeasts that DIDN'T turn their jaws into horns...
and more basal saucebeasts that drink plent blood...
...but a familiar drama is on the horizon.
Stay tuned for part 2 where the Homestuck connection in this alternate Sagan 4 becomes more obvious and irreversible because I don't want to write the WHOLE THING tonight
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