It appears that you have turned a shrew into a bearhog plent.

For the sake of having a record on the forum, as I mentioned in dms the description and art contradict one another; a pig-like snout like the ancestor would be more like this shape
user posted image

see this close-up of the ancestor's face
user posted image

Notably, my intent with the quillmow was to move away from the default shrew nose a little. Note how the nostrils are very large, the nose not super defined from the surrounding snout, and the lips are also bare.

Updated with new snozz

Any interactions with the (now seemingly ill-fated) Kurtback? (if you didn't see it, it's because it's pushed way back in the forum due to lack of comments)



" it's ancestor" Its ancestor.
Its quills seem to grow on its lower back and thighs, as well.
"anything once.Like it's ancestor" There's a spacing error, and an "it's" confusion.
"dig up food or break open rotten logs for food." This repeats "food" twice in the same sentence, which is awkward.
"Even xeno-bee" That isn't hyphenated.
"much like a polar bear" Did you mean "polar bear's", as in "polar bear's feet"?
A spine shape? What is that?
"predators such as the Sparkleshrog," There should be a comma after "predators".
There's surely more. I'll have to come back later.

QUOTE (Coolsteph @ Aug 17 2022, 07:29 PM)
" it's ancestor" Its ancestor.
Its quills seem to grow on its lower back and thighs, as well.
"anything once.Like it's ancestor" There's a spacing error, and an "it's" confusion.
"dig up food or break open rotten logs for food." This repeats "food" twice in the same sentence, which is awkward.
"Even xeno-bee" That isn't hyphenated.
"much like a polar bear" Did you mean "polar bear's", as in "polar bear's feet"?
A spine shape? What is that?
"predators such as the Sparkleshrog," There should be a comma after "predators".
There's surely more. I'll have to come back later.


Thanks as always for this. It is appreciated. I think I fixed everything you pointed out.

"it's ancestor"
"hollowed out" Hollowed-out.
"webbed much like" there should be a comma after "webbed".
"their tail", "their plumage", "their territory" Using "their" in the singular is such a common mistake in submissions that I'll have to add that to a common-mistakes guide, if I haven't already. I haven't edited that file in a while.
"they are to females" This is mildly confusing, since preceding sentences don't explicitly mention it's the males who display. It could be worth mentioning: after all, in a few species, such as in phalaropes, it's the females that make mating displays and show mating season-related aggression.
"roar. But sometimes". I know your descriptions tend to be choppy, but starting a sentence with "but" makes using a comma here particularly recommended.

"The Vonnegut Quillmow are"
Does "Quillmow" have an unusual plural? (Come to think of it, it might be handy to have an unusual-plural page on the wiki. For example, the Tusovendis, a purpleflora species, also has a nonstandard plural.)

The "it's ancestor" error is still there.

"one year of age and are fully grown at 2". Why swap out number forms twice in the same sentence? I recommnend using longhand for both for such small numbers.

I feel like this is different enough from its ancestor to warrant a new genus.

QUOTE (TheBigDeepCheatsy @ Aug 18 2022, 09:27 PM)
I feel like this is different enough from its ancestor to warrant a new genus.

Yeah, I have to agree here, could potentially have the genus name reference bearhogs due to vaugely looking them at a casual glance

QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Aug 18 2022, 08:51 PM)
QUOTE (TheBigDeepCheatsy @ Aug 18 2022, 09:27 PM)
I feel like this is different enough from its ancestor to warrant a new genus.

Yeah, I have to agree here, could potentially have the genus name reference bearhogs due to vaugely looking them at a casual glance


Arctohyus, perhaps? It's derived from ancient Greek terms for "bear" and "pig", and constructed similar to Latin Ursiporcus, the epithet for the Bearhog Plent.

QUOTE (Coolsteph @ Aug 18 2022, 04:40 PM)
"it's ancestor"
"hollowed out" Hollowed-out.
"webbed much like" there should be a comma after "webbed".
"their tail", "their plumage", "their territory" Using "their" in the singular is such a common mistake in submissions that I'll have to add that to a common-mistakes guide, if I haven't already. I haven't edited that file in a while.
"they are to females" This is mildly confusing, since preceding sentences don't explicitly mention it's the males who display. It could be worth mentioning: after all, in a few species, such as in phalaropes, it's the females that make mating displays and show mating season-related aggression.
"roar. But sometimes". I know your descriptions tend to be choppy, but starting a sentence with "but" makes using a comma here particularly recommended.

"The Vonnegut Quillmow are"
Does "Quillmow" have an unusual plural? (Come to think of it, it might be handy to have an unusual-plural page on the wiki. For example, the Tusovendis, a purpleflora species, also has a nonstandard plural.)

The "it's ancestor" error is still there.

"one year of age and are fully grown at 2". Why swap out number forms twice in the same sentence? I recommnend using longhand for both for such small numbers.


I tried to fix what i could. And i believe the ancestor's description also uses "2" at the send of the sentence. So that might need to be fixed on the wiki.

https://sagan4alpha.miraheze.org/wiki/Quillmow

What a fun and rowdy creature

Approval Checklist:
Art:
Art Present?:y
Art clear?:y
Gen number?:y
All limbs shown?:y
Reasonably Comparable to Ancestor?:y
Realistic additions?:y

Name:
Binomial Taxonomic Name?:y
Creator?:y

Ancestor:
Listed?:
What changes?:
External?: larger front claws, quill shaped tail
Internal?:
Behavioral/Mental?: steals burrows, butt quill displays
Are Changes Realistic?: y
New Genus Needed?: y, new tail

Habitat:
Type?: 2
Flavor?:3
Connected?: y
Wildcard?:

Size:
Same as Ancestor?:n
Within range?:y
Exception?:

Support:
Same as Ancestor?:y
Does It Fit Habitat?:
Reasonable changes (if any)?:
Other?: could list bones, or something, but technically it's just the same so pass.

Diet:
Same as Ancestor?:y
Transition Rule?:
Reasonable changes (if any)?:

Respiration:
Same as Ancestor?:y
Does It Fit Habitat?:y
Reasonable changes (if any)?:
Other?:

Thermoregulation:
Same as Ancestor?:y
Does It Fit Habitat?:y
Reasonable changes (if any)?:
Other?:

Reproduction:
Same as Ancestor?:y
Does It Fit Habitat?:y
Reasonable changes (if any)?:
Other?:

Description:
Length?: okayish
Capitalized correctly?:y, i think
Replace/Split from ancestor?: split
Other?:

Opinion: Approved

Agreed