Sagan 4 Forum [Menu]

The description suggests populations moved to the temperate habitats only because nesting space was scarce. Is it worth marking as "uncommon" in temperate habitats, or is it pretty common there anyway?

"it's ancestor": "its ancestor".
There are some grammar issues, but I'll have to get back to this later. Sometimes, I check Sagan 4 only briefly, and cannot provide sufficiently lengthy feedback.

" maturing the in first year."

the and in should be switched around

that's literally all I see in the description that ought to be edited.

If it consumes a lot of salt in its diet, why, then, would it need to scrape salt from mudflats and beaches? Did it initially develop a salt gland to regulate salt from its own diet, and then later adapted it into some kind of breath weapon? If so, does the consumption of extra salt only serve to recharge its "breath weapon" when it can't get enough salt otherwise?

Other than the salt issue, all other errors seem to be only in grammar. I will list a few below.

"except for one key difference," The comma should be a colon.
"Living on the coast[...]" The punctuation needs improvment. Try reading the description out loud to determine when to add commas and colons.
"target. Thus temporarily" The period should be a comma.

QUOTE (Coolsteph @ Nov 3 2022, 06:11 PM)

If it consumes a lot of salt in its diet, why, then, would it need to scrape salt from mudflats and beaches? Did it initially develop a salt gland to regulate salt from its own diet, and then later adapted it into some kind of breath weapon? If so, does the consumption of extra salt only serve to recharge its "breath weapon" when it can't get enough salt otherwise? Other than the salt issue, all other errors seem to be only in grammar. I will list a few below. "except for one key difference," The comma should be a colon. "Living on the coast[...]" The punctuation needs improvment. Try reading the description out loud to determine when to add commas and colons. "target. Thus temporarily" The period should be a comma.

Fixed.

maturing the in first year still needs to be written as maturing in the first year

QUOTE (Hydromancerx @ Sep 16 2022, 11:09 PM)

Maturing in the first year, individuals live for 5 years, .

I fixed the typo but something seems like it got cut off here. Is anything missing?

QUOTE (MNIDJM @ Feb 20 2023, 07:37 AM)

QUOTE (Hydromancerx @ Sep 16 2022, 11:09 PM) Maturing in the first year, individuals live for 5 years, . I fixed the typo but something seems like it got cut off here. Is anything missing?

Oh sorry no. Just bad copy pasta.

Approval Checklist:
Art:
Art Present?: Y
Art clear?: Y
Gen number?: Y
All limbs shown?: Y
Reasonably Comparable to Ancestor?: Y
Realistic additions?: Y

Name:
Binomial Taxonomic Name?: Y
Creator?: Y

Ancestor:
Listed?: Y
What changes?:

• External?:
• Internal?: Salt Sneeze
• Behavioral/Mental?:

Are Changes Realistic?: Y
New Genus Needed?: No

Habitat:
Type?: 2/3
Flavor?: 3/3
Connected?: Y
Wildcard?: N/A

Size:
Same as Ancestor?: N
Within range?: Y
Exception?: N/A

Support:
Same as Ancestor?: Y
Does It Fit Habitat?: Y
Reasonable changes (if any)?: N/A
Other?: N/A

Diet:
Same as Ancestor?: Y
Transition Rule?: N/A
Reasonable changes (if any)?: N/A

Respiration:
Same as Ancestor?: Y
Does It Fit Habitat?: Y
Reasonable changes (if any)?: N/A
Other?: N/A

Thermoregulation:
Same as Ancestor?: Y
Does It Fit Habitat?: Y
Reasonable changes (if any)?: N/A
Other?: N/A

Reproduction:
Same as Ancestor?: Y
Does It Fit Habitat?: Y
Reasonable changes (if any)?: N/A
Other?: N/A

Description:
Length?: Good
Capitalized correctly?: No
Replace/Split from ancestor?: Split
Other?: N/A

Opinion: Approved