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...Huh, I didn't know bubbleskins lost their milk. Today I learned.

There's some odd grammar, though I'm not great at articulating issues like that and I'll let Coolsteph handle it. I don't see any issues with the organism itself, it seems like a plausible transition from its ancestor and it has all the detail needed to understand what it is. This is a great first submission.

This post has been edited by Disgustedorite: Mar 4 2021, 05:49 PM

Thistle and Rose Welcome to the Sagan 4 team!

While we are still working out the issues with your submissions ancestry, we can't allow it just yet, but there's no reason you should be allowed to join and work on others.

Cube67 Welcome to the Sagan 4 team!

Please wait to submit this until Disgustedorite's elaboration submission is posted to post your submission, but you are welcome to post other submissions.

QUOTE (Disgustedorite @ Mar 4 2021, 08:49 PM)
...Huh, I didn't know bubbleskins lost their milk. Today I learned.

There's some odd grammar, though I'm not great at articulating issues like that and I'll let Coolsteph handle it. I don't see any issues with the organism itself, it seems like a plausible transition from its ancestor and it has all the detail needed to understand what it is. This is a great first submission.


Wait so, is this good?

Yes, I think your submission is good. Just some odd grammar that Coolsteph will probably comment on better than I can.

Alright, will say I have been trying to fix some grammatical errors.

I like the musculature and active pose. I like the art: it looks like watercolor.
I noticed the feet are different from its ancestor's. Spondylozoan legs are something up for revision now, so I'm not sure whether it's acceptable.

QUOTE (Coolsteph @ Mar 4 2021, 11:34 PM)
I like the musculature and active pose. I like the art: it looks like watercolor.
I noticed the feet are different from its ancestor's. Spondylozoan legs are something up for revision now, so I'm not sure whether it's acceptable.

The issue you refer to is not being applied to bubbleskins due to them being too old to fix. Depicting terran digitigrade legs is accurate for bubbleskins.

QUOTE (Coolsteph @ Mar 5 2021, 12:34 AM)
I like the musculature and active pose. I like the art: it looks like watercolor.
I noticed the feet are different from its ancestor's. Spondylozoan legs are something up for revision now, so I'm not sure whether it's acceptable.


But the leg configuration of the Bubbleskin's predate the snowball event, so its been present for a long time.

As for why the legs are thinner than its ancestor? well the Sprinting Bubbleskin relies more heavily on chasing down their prey, and those thick columellar legs of their ancestor would mean more weight that slows them down. Hence why they have become thinner.

Hopefully that covers your opinions! Also thank you for the positive feedback, its the first time I've done this kind of coloring!!

OviraptorFan Welcome to the team!

Please repost your species in the Organism Submission channel

user posted image
Cryobowler Srugeing (Scaphiumphilus ephermeralus)
Creator: Oofle
Ancestor: Srugeing
Habitat: Maineiac Temperate Riparian, Maineiac Temperate Beach, Maineiac Polar Beach.
Size: 20 cm Wingspan (Adult)
Diet: Adult: (N/A) Larvae: (Carnivore, Cloudswarmers, Minikruggs (Fallen Into Cryobowls),Kleptoparasite (Prey Caught by Carnivorous Cryobowls), Planktivore, Cryoutines.)
Respiration: Juvenile: Semi-active (Gill); Adult: Semi-active (Lung-like gill)
Thermoregulation: Heterotherm (Muscle Activity)
Support: ?

Reproduction: Sexual, Spawning in Water, Two Genders

As the Srugeing continued to live about in the way they do, with large flights of short-lived adults spawning long-lived larvae, most of which wouldn’t survive to adulthood, specialization was inevitable.

The Cryobowler Srugeing has split off from its ancestor and is specialized to spawn within cryobowls. This has come with a suite of adaptations to avoid predation from the very flora it is spawning in, and to ensure its larvae are able to fit in the (admittedly small) cryobowls. The first of such adaptations is the bright colors of the adult. Though at first they may seem random and nonsensically vibrant, are actually good for blending in with cryobowls from above, the pink and purple mottling mostly matching the fluid contained within the cryobowls. Also, similarly to their relative the Snowmelt Srugeing, Cryobowler Srugeings have internalized their ‘lung bumps’, which serves as a way to protect them and to increase how aerodynamic the Cryobowler Srugeing is.

Adult Cryobowler Srugeings do not eat. Although they retain a functional jaw and digestive system they mostly live off of fat reserves accumulated from their larval diet, which is mainly comprised of symbiotic cryoutines within the cryobowl, and also includes some small fauna.

Cryobowler Srugeings have little way to tell apart carnivorous cryobowls and non-carnivorous ones, but the eggs and larvae are able to release a protein that ’gums up’ the enzymes produced in these bowls. Although unable to protect the larvae from particularly caustic species, it is able to prevent most carnivorous cryobowls from digesting them.

Cryobowler Srugeings technically gain the ability to fly before true adulthood, since they are already born with large fins, the larvae are often pushed by their small birthplaces to take some adventurous first glides out. This is the reason why they do not lose their digestive system, as though it burns fat to fly, cryobowls often do not contain enough food or space for near-adult individuals. Thus, while for most of their larval stage they remain in the bowl, during the last few weeks individuals gain full flight, and it is during these last few weeks they experience most major changes as well. To be specific: they go through a small growth spurt, the upper, dorsal and abdominal fins atrophy while the lower tailfin lengthens (for aerodynamics) and the gonads mature.

Finally, in a synchronized event, these mature individuals stop eating for good and focus exclusively on mating, relying only on their sheer numbers to prevent predators from eating them all during the search for a cryobowl. This frantic final week is where females and males alike fly long distances to find suitably inhabited cryobowls to spawn within. Yet, by the end of the ~7 day period (the specific timing of this period tends to fluctuate a little bit depending on availability of food and predation rates), those same adults that had frantically fluttered with the utmost energy all the other days, are laying dead or dying on the ground or in the very cryobowls they spawned in.
Though the lung of a Cryobowler Srugeing needs to be kept moist to function, mature Cryobowler Srugeings do not moisturize it, as by the time it dries out in their native cool climates they’ll likely already have burnt most of their fat reserves in flight.


It's good to see you again, Oofle.
It's probably too late to participate into the Prime Specimen contest, but this could always be a non-Prime Specimen entry.

The lines in the template at the top should be capitalized, and it's customary to have no spacing between them, so there's only one tap of the enter key between lines. For example, the name, habitat list, size, and diet lines should all be capitalized.

There are some stray lines around the beak and fins that need to be cleaned up. There's a line that's not filled in with color just above the beak, and it's hard to interpret the tail. The tail seems to be split in half or pinched.

"within cryobowls, this has come". The comma should be a period.

"adult, which while". I recommend splitting that apart using "adult. While at first".

"do not eat" should end with a colon or period.

"which though often" That doesn't make sense. I recommend: "which is mainly comprised of symbiotic cryoutines within the cryobowl, with some small fauna."

"bowls, which though". I recommend: "bowls. "Although it is unable".
"is able to prevent" I suggest: "it is able to prevent".
"already born" should be "as they are already born".

There are some other misuses of commas here and breathless run-on sentences, too. Try reading your work out loud to detect run-on sentences. Posting your work into a text processor, such as Microsoft Word, may help you detect run-on sentences.

Don’t worry, I never intended for it to be a prime-specimen entry.
I have fixed the capitalizations and the pointed out issues as well, and will have finished working on the run-on sentences likely by the time you read this. Thanks for the input!
On the tail, the bottom fin is intentionally very large in comparison to the upper tail fin, is this what you mean by it looking pinched? Last I checked srugeings have two distinct tail fins, so I do not understand what exactly about it you’re pointing out here. The end admittedly does seem a bit cut-off to me now that I look, but this doesn’t seem too extreme as far as I can tell, I will fix this if you wish me to, but I don’t see how it’s too large of a deal.

user posted image The Shrogsapien are sapient animals that evolve from the Twigfisher Shrog and they have the ability to make spears and deadly weapons and also make clothes out of other creature's skin like the picture shown here which is a tribe member with Ramchin skin as clothing and they just like humans build shelter for themselves and bred certain animals for food and/or pets.

1. This is the wrong place, non-members submit species as replies here: http://sagan4.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=4
2. Sophonts (human-level intelligence/advancement) is not allowed.
3. You need to use the submission form given in the rules: http://sagan4.jcink.net/index.php?showtopic=1



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