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My only real question about this taxon is why the genus name is *Pteropiscoidea*, since that sounds more like a super family than a genus name.

QUOTE (Coolsteph @ Oct 27 2021, 03:09 PM)
The art looks fairly good. I like the variation in color patterns and fins.

There's a stray, un-filled line on the back wing of the brown Sruglette in the middle.

Increasing the contrast to reduce the distraction fo the paper texture is good. Certainly, the smudge at the bottom and the piece of the desk (?) at the upper-right should bbe removed, such as by trimming.


There's a spacing error after Silkruggs.

It would probably look better to put: "Omnivore (When perched in obvious position: Sapworms, Xenobees [...])", unless it's only Dartirs under the conditional part. "Hair Nimbuses" should be capitalized.

This seems to be almost entirely a carnivore. The Wolvershrog is listed with "carnivore" and "frugivore" separately, not as an omnivore listing meat first and fruit second. For these to match in their logic, diet rules really need to be clarified.

Remember to capitalize terms in the template.

"Descending from the cryobowler srugeing[...] This sentence needs to be modified so it's less breathless. Splitting it into two sentences or using a colon could work.

"Sruglings are a global genus[...]" this sentence needs to be split apart, and the name should be updated.

"consume prey,[...]" This sentence needs to be revised, such as by splitting it into two. That is also true for "Most species are fairly short-lived[...]" and "The biggest example[...]" and
"Almost all of these[...]". Try reading the sentences out loud to determine breathless sentences.

"eachother" (x3) Each other.

"All srugling [sic] species[...]" The parenthetical statement is so lengthy I recommend splitting it into its own sentence.

"their bristled beak" Their bristled beak.

"In summary, sruglings are the extremely generalist descendants of the cryobowler srugeing that have spread across the globe due to their ability to spawn just about anywhere, including the ocean, and the removal of the need to moisturize their lungs with water. They coexist with their ancestor due to the fact that they have lost the proteins to disable carnivorous cryobowl enzymes and the annuality of the cryobowler’s adult life."

With a slight adjustment, you could put this at the beginning as a brief summary for a long description, much as I made a brief summary for the long description for the Pollooks genus group in the Beta timeline.

I think I’ve got all of the text complaints, as for the image, how do either of these look?
user posted image
user posted image

This post has been edited by Oofle: Oct 27 2021, 01:27 PM

Also sorry the fix to the larva is a bit janky, didn’t have the drawing on hand at this time but will correct it later if needed

Try using the magic wand tool (if you're using GIMP, at least) over the white background specifically, and then simply using the eraser button set to a high size. Personally, I think the contrast-enhanced one does not look as good as the original, so just use the original for this.

I'll check over the sentences later.

I don't think it's a problem. The art already follows all rules.

They're so cute!

I am interested in some expansion on how they survive in open ocean.

I would assume those ones are capable of landing on driftwood, and their larvae stick near such items as well.

There is mention of some swimming underwater, but later the need to avoid aquatic predators is mentioned as great enough to produce better lungs. Maybe instead they just don't go in the water?

QUOTE (colddigger @ Oct 28 2021, 01:51 AM)
They're so cute!

I am interested in some expansion on how they survive in open ocean.

I would assume those ones are capable of landing on driftwood, and their larvae stick near such items as well.

There is mention of some swimming underwater, but later the need to avoid aquatic predators is mentioned as great enough to produce better lungs. Maybe instead they just don't go in the water?

Well, while they could avoid the whole lung moisturizing, they still need to spawn in water after all, and if you can’t land on the ground without becoming hugely exposed to predators the next best thing is to go into an element you’re at least semi-competent within. Besides, the surface of the water is the particular concern as it exposes you from every angle from the air and from the water, whilst just being underwater has you exposed to only underwater predators, which while still bad is still slightly less so.

Landing in the open ocean isn’t too much of a concern as landing-incompetent species don’t really do that because…they’re landing incompetent. Though species that do land could indeed probably land upon driftwood. Larval preferences would probably vary between species, you can only have so much available space at a floating piece of junk after all, though truly pelagic larvae probably aren’t very common.
The main issue probably is drowning/nocturnal predation as if they’re sitting on a piece of driftwood and deep into sleep they could probably get knocked off into the water fairly easily if it isn’t very wide, (pelagic puffgrass probably helps create sufficient platforms though) and open-water hunters could probably snatch a sleeping sruglette just in the open fairly easily (however, once again pelagic puffgrass would help here by creating camouflage-able surfaces on the rafts too).

If anyone thinks there’s sufficient issues with the logic above to warrant editing of the description though, do tell me!

QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 27 2021, 04:17 PM)
My only real question about this taxon is why the genus name is *Pteropiscoidea*, since that sounds more like a super family than a genus name.


Any response towards this question?

QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 29 2021, 01:58 PM)
QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 27 2021, 04:17 PM)
My only real question about this taxon is why the genus name is *Pteropiscoidea*, since that sounds more like a super family than a genus name.


Any response towards this question?

Well do you have any suggestions for a new one/how to fix it?

I’d say 8 days is probably a long enough time to wait to remind anyone who might want to review something that this exists.

QUOTE (Oofle @ Oct 29 2021, 04:05 PM)
QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 29 2021, 01:58 PM)
QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 27 2021, 04:17 PM)
My only real question about this taxon is why the genus name is *Pteropiscoidea*, since that sounds more like a super family than a genus name.


Any response towards this question?

Well do you have any suggestions for a new one/how to fix it?

Me and Dingus came up with Muscacetus, which partially acts as a reference to Exocetus, a genus of flying fish. It also literally translates into (fly-whale). Does that work for you?

QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Nov 7 2021, 11:08 AM)
QUOTE (Oofle @ Oct 29 2021, 04:05 PM)
QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 29 2021, 01:58 PM)
QUOTE (OviraptorFan @ Oct 27 2021, 04:17 PM)
My only real question about this taxon is why the genus name is *Pteropiscoidea*, since that sounds more like a super family than a genus name.


Any response towards this question?

Well do you have any suggestions for a new one/how to fix it?

Me and Dingus came up with Muscacetus, which partially acts as a reference to Exocetus, a genus of flying fish. It also literally translates into (fly-whale). Does that work for you?

Hmmm, seems fine to me I suppose, I’ll change it.

11 days seems like a fair timeframe to just, bump up the thread.

Cryobowler Srugeing isn't capitalized in the ancestor section

QUOTE (SpeedTowel @ Dec 16 2021, 06:38 AM)
Cryobowler Srugeing isn't capitalized in the ancestor section

Fixed



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